Friday, August 3, 2012

Keepin it real #3:The Friend Zone

Here at Kenyan Guru you know we are all for tech news and all that but once in a while there are just some very important that do not fall into our usual conversations in what I like to call Keepin it real.It being Friday I am sure some of you have already started plotting about the various set of adventures you have planned for the day and the weekend,but of late I have noticed that there is an increasing amount of people who are unaware of the Friend Zone.To put it simply this is the place where I am sure everybody has been in where you want a certain kafemale/kangarl/shorte/kamwari/kasupu to be your gal but instead she says that your friendship is just too dear to her in that she loves you like a brother and she just doesn't want to hurt your feelings and so on.By now am sure we are all on the same page so now we can get the ball rolling fast.To those of you still in the dark get yourself a kabundle and download a movie called Just Friends

Now that you are all up to speed how can you pre-emiptively avoid getting trapped in the friendzone?
Noooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!
Things to look out for;
-There is a lot of talk about previous relationships
-You never argue
-You are always in the company of 3 or more of her friends(1 out of these 3 usually doesn't drink and is usually sober no matter the occasion
-She calls you her best friend
-She says she loves you like a brother or even worse a little brother

The signs are many and so now once you discover what is afoot you will obviously ask yourself what to do next and here are a few things to start you off;

The reverse friendzone

Whhhhhhyyyyyy!!!!!!!

You have to be extremely quick to accomplish this one and all it entails is a basic role reversal.Alot of douchebaggery must also come into play.One way of accomplishing this is by taking an extreme liking to her friends and also other girls she does not like or hate.This drives home the point that your confidence knows no limits and can reach very arrogant levels when need be.

The hanging tough

Gonna make it


The All In


Or you could hang in there and wait to see how things go.The outcomes are many,you could be BFFs forever and on your birthday you always know you are going to get a gift,and on hers you will do the same,you could end up together and live happily ever after(yes,its possible,haha),or worse you could end up together and make each other miserable and you will have acquired a very dangerous enemy who knows all your secrets and weaknesses(can't you see how worried Chris Brown is)











The riskiest and best option in my opinion,whip out your machine guns and storm into her heart bringing hell with you,no mushy romantic stuff,just lay all the feelings on the table and let her decide.The All in has to be done in the most bad-ass way possible because if it fails and you get shot down you need to land on your feet like you are so badass you can sleep walk on the moon
YEAH


Friday, July 20, 2012

Bring lots of fun and trolling to facebook with RageFaces

One drawback I have always found with text based communication is the inability to properly display facial emotion with it.Smilies keep it pretty basic with smiley face,sad face and face with sunglasses which are all pretty amusing but not enough to really make me laugh out loud(that is why LOL is something I have never written in a message or on facebook).But now with AllTheRageFaces you can add a rage face as a status update or as a comment on post.This makes conversations on Facebook much more indepth,especially if people are commenting on pictures.So what are you waiting for?Get on facebook and make someone's day much better or much worse.To add one to your post or status update just go to the site,select the face you want and copy the link and paste it in facebook then post.
Personally these are some of my favourites;
Dark stare/Where are my cookies?

Drumroll please!

True Story





Friday, July 13, 2012

Google Maps now offers walking directions for Kenya and 43 other African countries

Wouldn't say that it's groundbreaking but at least now you can get walking directions using Google maps on the net and on your mobile phone.Nokia maps already offered this feature but its a breathe of fresh air for the various android users(Ideos mostly)
The picture on the left shows the web interface and the picture at the bottom shows the mobile interface






Wednesday, June 13, 2012

New pay-TV service now available

A Chinese company called StarTimes has entered the market and is aiming to challenge DSTV who have had a strong hold on the pay TV market.As usual their selling point is affordability and they are offering their digital recorder for ksh.2,999 and subscription packages starting from ksh.499 with the most expensive being 1,999.They are offering all the popular channels such as CNN and Discovery World but their movie channels are not very enticing.Here is a picture of their packages


For more info you can check out their website at:http://www.startimes.co.ke/

There is no SPAM on this site

For those of you coming to this site from google might have noticed a malware warning,not to worry for everything is A-OK

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Google Adsense Western Union payment now available to Kenyans

For Kenyan Adsense publishers who have been groaning about cheque payment you no longer have to frown as Kenya has been added to the list of supported countries for Western Union payment.You no longer have to wait for cheques in the mail as all you have to do is visit a Western union agent once the funds have been disbursed.To change your form of payment just login to adsense and you will find payment settings under account settings.A national ID though is required to receive payment form the agent.Here is a list of countries supported so far;


Algeria
Argentina
Bahrain
Barbados
Benin
Bolivia
Bulgaria
Burkina Faso
Cameroon
Chile
China (Mainland)
Colombia
Costa Rica
Cote d'Ivoire
Croatia
Dominican Republic
Ecuador
Egypt
Ethiopia
Gambia
Georgia
Ghana
Guatemala
Iceland
Indonesia
Jamaica
Jordan
Kenya
Kuwait
Latvia
Lebanon
Libya
Lithuania
Madagascar
Malta
Malaysia
Mauritius
Mexico
Moldova
Morocco
Mozambique
Nepal
Nicaragua
Oman
Pakistan
Palestinian Territories
Panama
Paraguay
Peru
Philippines
Puerto Rico
Qatar
Reunion (FR)
Romania
Saudi Arabia
Senegal
Seychelles
Slovenia
South Korea
Taiwan
Tanzania
Thailand
Tunisia
Uganda
United Arab Emirates
Uruguay
Venezuela
Vietnam
Virgin Islands (British)
Yemen
Zambia

Monday, August 29, 2011

Kenyan Webcomics

With the number of people finally discovering the power of blogger,there has been a rise in the number of blogs that are getting attention from the local internet users.Todays post will be concentrating on webcomics.Webcomics are basically as the name says comics that are published online on a website or blog.Majority of the most popular ones on the internet are based on videogame humour such as PennyArcade,NerfNow and AnotherVideoGameWebcomic just to name a few.For the scientists,programmers and physicists you will definately enjoy xkdc.So today I decided to track down some local webcomics and I was lucky with the help of google to find a few.

A comic that started a few months ago and has been getting better and better with every new character they introduce.From the mind of Melman is a comic about a caveman who survived the ice age and now has to survive the daily challenges of a corporate job.Here is a small snippet,visit the main site for more.

Is a miniseries written and illustrated by Chief Nyamweya. It is based on pre-independence Kenya as seen through the eyes Chege Karobia and Kim (Dedan Kimathi).You may be familiar with Chief Nyamweya's work in the Star newspaper.
Simple comic about everyday life with a touch of daily fustrations.Looks like it hasn't been updated in a while but the older comics are still worth a read

If you know any other webcomics that you enjoy leave a link in the comments section and I'll add them here.